You know you're sick when...

The flu of the century hit our house this past weekend. All of us got it but luckily my husband was well enough to take care of us... and hopefully he doesn't fully come down with it. Bored of out my skull today, I decided to remark on a card from http://someecards.com that poked fun of Alzheimer's. A few people responded by telling me to lighten up and that sometimes laughter is the only thing we have when illness strikes. On that note, I'd like to recap the top 10 ways we knew we were sick beyond repair.

1. Catheter and diabetes supplies are only a phone call away. You know that because you've seen about a million ads. Do you need any advice on denture cream?
2. The water department calls to ask if you have a leak because your household water use has tripled. At this point you pray that your washing machine doesn't die.
3. Your washing machine tries to die as you attempt to wash a queen size quilt... I know some of you can.
4. You start to worry that the health department will have your house condemned. This might be an easier solution than cleaning it once you have the strength
5. The thought of brushing your teeth is more disgusting to you than not brushing them.
6. A shower sounds so good but can you make it back to bed?
7. An annoying thought or phrase gets stuck in your head over and over and over and ov.....
8. Your dreams would carve a great time slot on the sci-fi channel. Was that a turtle you were having a martini with on the back of a cloud?
9. If you're not sick yet, you lay in bed half asleep knowing that your children will soon need you but that you need your rest because it's only a matter of time. Was that heartburn or the flu quickly creeping into your stomach?
10. The thought, "this is a disease nobody has ever heard of before. Someday, it will be named after me because this is going to do me in," repeats in your head.

Stay healthy my friends!

What matters most?

I can't tell you the number of times I've been standing in line at a store, doing my best to keep my kids from hitting one another or taking down a near by display, only to hear someone tell me, "Enjoy it now. These years go by so fast." I know these strangers have the best intentions and that what they are telling me is true. However, when I've "had a day" it's a little annoying and overwhelming to hear. Tell a crazed mother of a toddler that these are the best years and you'll likely have her crying a river because she believes that this really is as good as it gets.

I love to scrapbook. It's time spent crafting, talking with friends and looking at pictures of the good times. Nobody ever scraps the fight they've had with their husband, a funeral they were at... well some people might but they're kinda strange, or the time their kid woke up decorating the halls with vomit. No, the times you scrapbook are the good times and those that are to be remembered. Every time I look at pictures just a year old, I'm amazed at how much my kids have grown. It really is scary to realize how quickly time marches on. I'm amazed every Sunday that it really has been a week since I sat in my pew and heard the last sermon. All of this reflection got me thinking, what are my priorities?

Take out a piece of paper and a pen. Write down what you wish your priorities were. In a perfect world how much time would you spend with God? What about with your kids and their homework? What about your exercise routine? How much time would you want to spend on a clean house or paying bills. Be realistic and realize that some of these tasks have to stay on your list whether or not you like it. Next, write a list of the things you do everyday. Next to those activities, write down the amount of time it takes you to do these things. Now, list them by how much time they take you, the most amount of time first descending down to the things that take the least amount of time. Compare your two lists. Are the activities you wish had priority in your life really the ones that are most important?

In reality, most of us will admit that our exercise routine doesn't get as much attention as our housecleaning. More of us will admit that our time with God really starts to fall towards the end of the list even though we might want it towards the top 3. What drives you to accomplish the things on your "real" list? Are they set appointments or commitments? Do you write them down on your to-do list? Schedule your day differently. Take your top priorities from your ideal list and schedule those first. Write it down and stick with your plan. Try it for just one week and see how you feel. You might realize at the end that this really is as good as it gets!

Red light, Green light

In these modern times, I can't believe I still can't turn my doorbell on and off. I'm sure someone has already invented this but why isn't readily available to consumers? We can turn our home phones off, set our cell phones to silent or vibrate, have our emails automatically respond that we're unavailable but we can't stop our doorbells from ringing.

We're lucky to live on a great street with lots of kids. Unfortunately, our street is a through street that serves as a speedway for many cars. After requests were denied for speed bumps, I've decided that I'm just not comfortable letting my 6-year-old play in the front yard unattended. It is rare that I have time to sit outside while my kids play so they usually end up in the back yard or in the playroom. Many of my son's friends do play outside and ask if he can come out.

One day, my doorbell rang 6 times... yes 6 times. Luckily I didn't have a sleeping baby upstairs but I was starting to go a little "ringy dingy" myself. It's not that I don't want kids asking to play with my son. It's fun to watch him develop friendships with kids on our street. However, I really do need a way to organize my time and set up playtimes with his friends. I think I've finally found a solution and I hope it works for you as well.

I made a two-sided card that hangs in the front window near my door. One side is green and the other is red. I explained to my son's friends that when the card is red that he can't come outside and not to ring the doorbell except in case of an emergency. When the card is green, he can play and it's okay to ring the doorbell. Until summer hits, this card will likely stay red most of the time but it really is working for our family. It's always so hard when a friend comes over, rings the bell and I have to tell him that we can't play. My kids get so disappointed and I feel guilty that I don't drop whatever I'm doing and rush outside for a play date. I think it's better for our friends too because they don't have to come all the way up to our front door only to be told "no" again. I find that this system works better than "do not ring bell" because I may still want my vendors and other people to ring the bell.

Say what? Conversations to have before becoming a stay-at-home Mom

At the age of 9, I decided I wanted to be an attorney specializing in mergers and acquisitions... seriously. I was going to live in an enormous street of dreams house, have the perfect marriage, great kids, have a nanny and run an amazingly successful law firm out of my home. Somehow, I thought I'd also be President of the PTA, run every school fundraiser and have blue birds fly around land on my finger on command. Reality? I've got a wonderful marriage, great kids, a nice house, no job and I do my best with school fundraisers. It's like Cinderella without the mice and blue birds. Reality? I'm so glad that I didn't go down the attorney/career path and that I'm lucky enough to stay at home with my kids but it has it's ups and downs too.

I was at a party a couple years ago when I ran into a woman I used to work with. Single and very successful, this woman talked to me as if I was an invalid. Towering over me at nearly 5' 9 she looked down on me in every sense of the word and said,

"I just don't know how you do it."

Do what? Cook, clean, get the kids dressed and out the school every day, do the laundry, pay the bills, homework... that? I looked at her and thought,

"lady you have no idea. That's the easy part."

Another time, when expressing frustration about my day, a working mother reminded me that I chose to stay at home... gee thanks. That's exactly what I needed to hear.

"You chose to work,"

I felt like saying. So exactly what is the hard part about staying at home? Until you do it, you might be surprised at the answer.

If you're lucky enough to love what you do, it might be an incredibly difficult decision to leave your career to raise your family. If, like me, you hate your job a pregnancy might be your saving grace. Of course the first thing that comes to your mind are the income that you'll lose. You might have a company car or great benefits that will disappear if you leave. You might love the people you work with, or seriously dislike them but have a blast talking about them with your friends... did I just say that? Here are some important questions to ask yourself when making the decision to be a stay-at-home mom.

1. Can we survive on one salary? What is my true income?

• What would childcare cost?
• Are you and your spouse in a higher tax bracket because of your combined income?
• What conveniences do you pay before because your working? These might be house cleaning, dry cleaning, eating at restaurants, higher cell phone plans, etc.
  
• How much are you spending on clothing needed for your job? What about dry cleaning?
• What are your commuting costs? Would your insurance go down if you weren't commuting? What about gas and maintenance on your vehicle?

2. What will be expected of you if you stay home?

This might seem obvious at first. You might think it's to take care of your home and kids. What does that mean exactly? Will you suddenly be responsible for ALL housework? Let me tell you that having this burden with a newborn will make you feel like a loser fast. Your energy with a new baby will be nill at best. Your house will likely suffer. Talk to your spouse about household duties and decide beforehand who will do what. Talk about expectations. Will your spouse have checklists for you? Will you feel angry and resentful towards your spouse if he/she expresses disappointment for your "chores" not being completed?

3. How will you receive recognition and validation?

"The love of my children is all I need."

I've heard this before. I've said this before. If you're used to getting bonuses, awards, closing deals, getting high marks on a performance review, get ready to reset your expectations. Remember that clean house I was talking about? A clean house rarely goes hand in hand with a happy child. It's a delicate balance that can often leave you feeling like you can't win. Instead of achieving quotas, increasing performance or being rewarded for great customer service, you'll be faced with a never ending laundry basket, bill after bill to be paid, on half the income you're used to, and dishes to be done. While faced this before, finishing these tasks will become your accomplishments for the day. On the other hand, seeing your baby's first steps, getting slobbery kisses, watching them sleep and playing ferry princess in a blanket fort will make this well worth it!

4. What will be your intellectual outlet?

Since becoming a mom, I can tell you all of the Disney Princesses, I know more about Legos and Star Wars than I ever thought I would and I'm a pro about car seats and what makes Toyota the best minivan on the market. If you asked me to run a regression analysis or balance a company's payroll, although incredibly excited at the challenge, I'd likely end up sitting in the corner drooling. I've often sat for 20 minutes watching Handy Manny looking for the deeper message and then looked around to realize I was the only one in the room. Reading, hobbies and close friendships are a perfect way to keep your head going and maintain good emotional health but you must make time for them.

5. Who will pay the bills?
Will your spouse's money truly be your money? Will you be responsible for paying the bills? Will your spouse feel resentful if you're not making money but telling him/her how to spend the family income? Have a careful discussion about the budget and financial responsibilities of the household.

6. How will you make time for yourself?

Be sure to set aside some money for babysitters. It can be so difficult to find someone reliable and trustworthy to watch your kids. Ask other moms, teachers or respected kids in the neighborhood. Make it a priority to get out with your friends at least twice a month. Don't forget your spouse! Make date night a priority! Keep in mind that things like going to the doctor or getting a haircut are a little more complicated now. It can be difficult to find a sitter in the middle of the day that doesn't cost a fortune. Who is your support network?

7. How will you structure your days?

If you're a list maker, having a list of things you'd like to accomplish or do for fun will structure your day. It's so easy to spend half the day "getting ready" only to find it's 3pm and you have more things to do than hours in the day. This is especially true when your children start going to school. Consider having a set routine after dropping the kids off at school. It might be heading to the gym or over to Starbucks to clear your head. Do something that will get you out of the house so you're dressed and ready for the day. I have yet to go to the gym or the coffee shop in my sweatpants and uggs... hopefully I never will!

8. How will your reference group change?

One of the biggest changes stay-at-home moms face is a change in their social circle. I have a friend that dearly loves my children but her eyes start to glaze over when I tell her about the fine details of my kids. Other moms in my life are all to happy to discuss these things. Learn which friend is best to vent to, to discuss your kids with, to call when you need a good cry, a good laugh or someone to offer advice. Don't expect one friend to offer all of these things or you'll surely be disappointed. As you search for other stay-at- home parents avoid the spouse bashing trap. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten together for a play-date only to have the other mom talk trash about her husband the entire time we're together. While we all have frustrations with our spouses and we need a friend to vent to, this is a really negative trap to get into. Without even knowing it, hanging out with a negative person can turn your thoughts and emotions negative as well. Look for positive, energetic but real people to surround yourself with. The phrase "misery loves company" is so true. While everyone has a bad day from time to time, avoid negative people. Lillian Glass wrote an excellent book about toxic relationships called, "Toxic People." If you find yourself in one of these relationships, I highly recommend this book.

For some parents, having a dedicated stay-at-home parent is the answer. For others, it works best to have two working parents and for single parents the decision is made for you. I feel very fortunate that I can stay home with my kids. If you're working and wish you were at home, remember that the grass isn't always necessarily greener on the other side. Be grateful that you have an intellectual outlet, some time away and recognition and achievements outside the home. While a lot of what I've had to say puts a negative spin on staying at home, it has been incredibly rewarding for me. My son was diagnosed with a speech disorder that required Extensive speech and Occupational therapies. There is absolutely no way we could have gotten him to all of his therapies and made the progress that we have as a family if I hadn't been able to stay at home. God has made it clear that my place is at home for right now. When making your decision, remember every scenario has good and bad points. I hope I've helped you consider some things about staying at home that you may not have considered before. Now, go hug those kiddos of yours!

20 uses for baby wipes

In my previous life, it wasn't unusual to find me sitting in an interview where strange questions would test my critical reasoning skills... or my sanity. I remember one, "If you could go back in time and invent one thing, what would it be?" My answer probably would have been something like an airplane or, like Al Gore, the internet. Since becoming a mother, my answer has changed dramatically! What would I have invented you ask? Baby Wipes! Luckily we're out of diapers at my house but we still have tons of baby wipes laying around. Here are some great uses for these little gems.

1. Removing stains from your clothing. This works best if you can blot the stain quickly before it sets but you'd be amazed at the set stains these wipes can remove.
2. Clean the slats in your blinds. Grabbing the top and underside with a wipe is a quick and effective way to get your window treatments looking like new.
3. Get your baseboards and woodwork sparkling. This is especially helpful for chair rail which always seems to be covered in dust.
4. Your kids. Duh right? Keep them in your car and wash off their milk mustache before running off to school.
5. Remove your make-up. I'm not an optometrist so use with caution but these are great for taking off your mascara and eye make-up.
6. Keep a package in your car and wipe down your dash while waiting in line to pick up the kids or make your ATM deposit.
7. Don't forget your furry friends. Wipes are great for muddy paws. Wipe down your dog or cat's coat with a wipe to remove surface dirt, excess hair and dander. This is great for those that suffer from allergies. Follow with a dryer sheet to help spot smell better.
8. At the office and notice your leather shoes are looking dull? Give them a quick pass with a wipe if you don't have time for a shoe shine.
9. Are your leather wallets and handbags showing their age? Rub them down with a wipe and you'll be amazed at how much dirt comes off.
10. Make your watches like new again.
11. Remove ink from your rubber stamps and fingers
12. Going on a beach vacation, buy wipes that contain aloe and use on sunburns for instant relief.
13. Did you little artist decorate your walls? Try a baby wipe to remove crayon from your walls. If that doesn't work, the magic eraser will.
14. Clean your computer screen.... be careful as some surfaces could scratch or become streaked.
15. On your keyboard, cell phones and home telephones (clorox wipes are best for this)
16. Only got a minute, wipe down your bathroom counters, sink, fixtures and back of your toilet.
17. Are you a scrapbooker? Use a wipe to clean off your cricut mat.
18. Clean toys that read "spot clean only". These are also great for cleaning vinyl doll heads/ faces, legos, cars and video game controllers
19. Ceiling fans. First, take a pillowcase and wipe down each blade of the fan. This will knock all of the dust inside a concealed case rather than on the floor below. Second, wipe down each blade with a wipe to remove and excess dust or dirt.
20. Light switch covers look like new with a swipe of a wipe.

If your wipes dry out, a few drops of water will make them new again. My favorite wipes are from Costco. They're priced great, come in handy individual packages and they stay moist for a long time.

Top 7 ways to keep tabs on your kiddos

I remember the days when I wouldn't even think of taking the kids to the zoo without my husband in tow. It seemed like my son would run one way and my daughter the other. I spent so much of my time worried that I'd get separated from them. Years later, as we planned our Disneyland trip, these memories came flying back. Sure, my kids are old enough now to tell an adult they they're lost, to give the names of their parents and maybe our home phone number but exactly what would we do if we became separated from our kids at the happiest place on earth?

As we entered the park, I saw several parents attach leashes to their children. Really? A leash? I mean no offense to any family that has found this to be a workable solution but the idea kind of gives me the willies. Inspired by commercials for Disney phone apps, I was reminded of my cell phone. I grabbed a ball point pen and wrote my cell number on their right arms. The next day, I improved upon this idea by using a permanent black sharpie. You would have been amazed by the number of parents that thought my idea was brilliant... even Belle from Beauty in the Beast commented. Here are some pointers to help calm your nerves while visiting a crowded place with your children.

1. Use a permanent, easy to read, marker and write your phone number somewhere visible on your child.
2. If using suntan lotion, your ink will smear or not adhere. Consider writing the number on the upper arm under a sleeve or across your little one's stomach.
3. Do not write your child's name or your name on your child. A stranger could use this information to make your child more comfortable when interacting with them. Imagine a stranger approaching your child, calling him/her by name and then saying, "your mommy (insert name here) told me to come get you. " Your child would likely wipe the stranger danger from his mind... a person isn't a stranger if they know my name or my Mom's name right?
4. If you can't find a spot to write on your child, use a name badge to write your number on and attach it to his or her shirt. Or, make a pin on button with your number written on it.
5. Take a photograph of your child before entering the attraction. Having a current photo with the clothes your child is wearing that day will allow for a better search should your child turn up missing.
6. If you want to go hi-tech, consider a GPS unit available at best buy and other electronic dealers.
7. If you're looking for a more stylish, more expensive way to tag your kiddos, check out this cool website. http://store.safetytat.com/store/