The do's and don'ts when working with a recruiter

If you read my most recent blog post, you have come to realize that working with recruiters can be a little more complicated than it might first appear. Here are some do's and don'ts when working with a recruiter:

DO

1. Put your best foot forward. This recruiter is screening you to see if you are the best fit for their client. They are interviewing you.

2. Call for interview prep if needed. This recruiter wants you to do well so they can make a placement and get paid. They will have the buzz words that the employer is wanting.

3. Be punctual and professional. While the recruiter might have hidden motives, they are the gatekeeper to your possible future employer.

4. Ask how they got your name. If they can't be specific keep your guard up.

5. Work with multiple recruiters if you are in an active job search. Multiple recruiters will represent multiple clients. Keep track of your recruiters and the interviews you go on. More than once I've had recruiters fight over who should get credit for the hire. The recruiter that gets you the interview is the recruiter that should get credit.

6. If you feel that the interviewer has objections or apprehensions, bring these up to the recruiter so he or she can work through them.

7. Follow up and be enthusiastic. If this recruiter likes you and sees your true value, he or she will be excited to place you with other opportunities that come along.

8. Express apprehensions with your recruiter. If you see red flags, tell the recruiter so he might investigate and better qualify what's really going on. If you're not interested, tell the recruiter so you don't waste anyone's time.

9. Define the roles, responsibility and pay with your recruiter before moving forward.

Don'ts

1. Do not tell the recruiter the specific names of other companies you are interviewing with. This will only mean competition for you. If your recruiter learns of another hiring company, he or she will likely contact that company and try to find candidates for the open position.

2. Don't reveal all your cards. After the interview, you might present one or two generic questions that the hiring manager asked you but not all of them.

3. Don't rely on the recruiter to communicate with your hiring manager. Be sure to get the card of each person you interview with so you can facilitate your own communication without relying on the recruiter for everything.

4. Don't give just anyone your resume. It has important, personal information about you. The more people that know you're looking, the greater chance your current job will be jeopardized. Make sure that you indicate several times that it is NOT okay to contact your current employer for a background check!

5. Do not give references to your recruiter. Give them directly to the hiring manager. You could be handing your recruiter a list of potential candidates to call through.

6. Do not try to facilitate the payment arrangements between your hiring manager and your recruiter. This has happened and it's a red flag that your recruiter is unprofessional and likely a jerk. It happens!

7. Don't call a million times a day. If you're waiting to hear some feedback, once or twice during the week is acceptable.

8. Do not go behind the recruiter's back to the hiring company. Once the recruiter tells you the name of the company, it is not okay for you to pursue it on your own or tell another recruiter about the opportunity. However, if you tell the recruiter that you're interested and that you want an interview, it's fair game. If another recruiter contacts you with the same opportunity you might tell them that you're working on that with another recruiter but you'll keep him updated. If the original recruiter hasn't lined up an interview after repeated requests, tell the second recruiter you'd like to pursue the opportunity. Not only will this make the recruiter mad and possibly get you blacklisted from all recruiters, it puts the hiring manager in a tough spot when determining who to credit. Sometimes, a hiring manager will decide to go with another candidate rather than deal with the hassle of fighting the recruiter.

What recruiters don't tell you

I love learning about careers. I love helping someone figure out what he wants to do in life, put together a resume and then prepare for the interviews. I'm one of the strange ones that enjoys going on an interview... although I haven't officially been on one in ages. As you might suspect, I thought these interests would lend well to a career in recruiting. For a few short weeks of my life, I sat behind a desk calling random people telling them about "great" opportunities. I would leave my overzealous messages and wait for the return phone calls. Why did I do this for such a short time you ask? I suck at lying and I hate it. My boss told me that I just didn't like being on the phone... well, if you ask my parents, you couldn't pry the phone from my hands when I was growing up. If you ask AT&T, they would likely tell you I'm one of their best customers. I loved being on the phone. What I didn't like was lying to every single person I talked to during my short recruiting stint. Getting fired from that job was a dream come true... I just didn't know it yet.

Recruiting firms are working for the hiring client, not you. I must note that there are exceptions to this rule. Some recruiters will look for jobs specifically for you if either (a) you're a fantastic candidate with a rock solid resume or (b) you agree to pay a lofty sum of money. In either scenario, you're probably better off looking for a job yourself.

Here's how it works. Lets use the Acme corporation for an example. The recruiter, let's call him Carl, calls through a bunch of companies promising to find great candidates and at least one that the company will want to hire. Of course this service doesn't come for free. If Acme agrees to hire one of these candidates, thousands of dollars will be owed to the recruiting company. So, Acme agrees to these terms in writing and the search begins. Recruiter Carl sets out to find the star employee by posting on the Internet, looking through linkedin.com, networking, etc. Here's the part you might not know. The best employees are usually already working. Carl knows this so he calls companies that produce the best type of candidates for Acme company. He targets companies that train their employees well and have rigorous interview and hiring policies. He seeks companies with a proven track record of success that only hire the best. Here's how the conversation might go:

"Hello, thank you for calling XYZ company. How may I direct your call?" Receptionist.

"Oh, I'm hoping you can help me. This is John and I recently went to a luncheon where I met one of your employees. I was really hoping to connect with her but I can't remember her name. It's right on the tip of my tongue. I know I'd remember it if I heard it," Carl.

Carl waits for the receptionist to start rattling off names. Carl writes these names down and keeps searching. He knows that Acme likes to hire young, attractive men and women that are recent college grads with a few years experience tucked under their belts. He continues but this time, he gets more specific.

"No, I don't think that was her name. She was younger, probably about 24 or 25. Tall, blond, very sharp," Carl.

"Oh, you must mean Cindy. Let me put you through," Receptionist.

"Thank you. What is her extension if I get disconnected?"

Cindy isn't in the office so her voicemail picks up.

"Hello Cindy! My name is Carl and an anonymous source told me that you'd be great for a fantastic job opportunity I have. My client is a fortune 500 company that doubled their profits in the past year. They're one of Fortune Magazine's top 100 companies to work for they're offering a very attractive package with realistic first year earnings of at least $100,000. If you could please call me back at your earliest convenience I'd really appreciate it. Thank you and I look forward to hearing from you soon," he hangs up and records Cindy's name in a log indicating what company she works for and the date he contacted her. Then he waits for her to return the call.

Carl has never met Cindy. Never seen her and likely never will. He has no idea what her qualifications are, if she's happy in her present job or if she would be a good fit for Acme. What he really cares about it placing Cindy at Acme and getting paid for the placement. Heck, he'd be better off if Cindy didn't work out and Acme came running to him to replace her with another candidate. Carl continues this method of searching for at least another few hundred calls before he eventually does find a couple candidates to interview and hopefully a hire. Since he has Cindy's extension, he can call through other extensions that are close in number to hers where he can offer up the same word track as before. His dream would be to get a dial-by-name directory of all the people in her department. After all, most people don't tell their co-workers about recruiter calls and opportunities. You'd be surprised how many times I arrived at an interview only to see a co-worker waiting in the lobby to interview after me. Recruiters love to throw a bunch of candidates from one company to see if one will stick.

Cindy does call Carl back and Carl starts seeing dollar signs as he realizes that Cindy is exactly what the company is looking for. He arranges an interview but tells Cindy that she must call him before and after the interview for prep and follow-up. Carl knows what the client is looking for and knows what buzz words to give Cindy in order for her to shine in the interview. These may or may not be words that Cindy would normally use and this might be a company that will be a great fit or maybe not. What matters is that Cindy is sold on the job and pumped up so that she can go sell herself in the interview. Carl takes special time to make sure that Cindy creates phrases to use that incorporate these buzz words and qualities and he teaches her things to avoid. Perhaps he got these avoidance topics directly from Acme when he asked about things that made other employees not work out in the past. Cindy goes on her interview and excitedly calls Carl afterwards.

"Hi Carl, the interview went great! I think they really like me. They want me to come back next week and meet the rest of their team," Cindy.

"That's great Cindy. When is that interview scheduled for? What questions did they ask you?"

Carl sits and writes down ever single question that Cindy can recall. He takes careful notes about the details of the interview so that he can properly prepare and educate his next candidate. These details aren't necessarily to help Cindy but to help Carl place a candidate if Cindy doesn't work out.

Carl talks to the hiring manager at Acme and learns that they really like Cindy but they have another candidate with more experience. They will continue to interview Cindy but they do have someone else waiting in the wings. Carl decides not to tell Cindy about this because he wants her to remain excited and energized about the prospect just in case the other candidate doesn't work out or decides not to accept the job. In fact, when Acme begins to stall with Cindy as they await an acceptance from candidate B, Carl makes excuses for the hiring manager, telling Cindy that he is out of town and not to worry about not getting a call back yet.

Meanwhile, Cindy has been distracted from her job that she was otherwise happy with and she has started to question if there's something better. Her productivity starts to slide as she works with recruiters and starts to interview. She may or may not find something that makes her happier. The more likely scenario is that her boss finds out that she's looking and she jeopardizes her existing job. Unfortunately, I know this from personal experience.

There are good recruiters out there that genuinely want the best for you. I would argue that this is the exception and not the rule.

Another tactic that recruiters often use is to post a job opportunity that doesn't really exist. Recruiters love to build up their "resume bank" to have great candidates waiting for prospective hiring managers. A bait and switch technique, many candidates will call about a posting, send in their resume and then be told that the job was filled. If the recruiter has another, less sexy client, he will often try to pass off this "new opportunity" to the candidate. Sometimes the recruiter won't even call the candidate back. Why would he when he has a resume to file and follow up on for the next hot opportunity that comes by?

Stay tuned for the do's and don't when working with a recruiter.

Get it write!

If you're like me and have an "s" in your name, you might still be reeling from learning to write. I remember how frustrated my mom would get when I'd continue to write my S's backwards. Luckily, my daughter doesn't have an "s" in her name but she's still struggling to control her pencil the right way. I went in search of tools to help her learn and here are some helpful hints.

• http://desktoppub.about.com/od/lessonplans/ig/Free-Print---Cursive-Fonts/Penmanship-Print.htm This website allows you to download a free font that places numbers on those hat, belt and shoe lines that you hear your kids talk about.
• http://www.otideas.com/Items/PencilGrips.htm Pencil grippers can help your child learn to hold a pencil properly. This site has some for purchase... shop around as these seem a little pricey
• Use short and fat pencils. Think about the size of your adult hand in relation to your pens and pencils. Now consider how small a child's hand is. You can purchase these pencils at your local Children's bookshop.
• Make it fun! Consider using a white board and markers. Mix it up on paper by using markers, crayons, glitter and glue or sidewalk chalk on a sunny day

Quick and easy tips to chop your meal prep in half!

Here are some fast and easy tips on chopping that will surely cut your meal prep in half!

• Cutting herbs: Take a hand full of fresh herbs and place them into a narrow juice glass. Using kitchen shears, chop vertically until thoroughly minced. Be sure to take a whiff... the smell will be amazing!

• Slicing meat: To get thin strips of chicken or steak for fajitas or salads, cook the piece of meat whole. When the meat is still about a minute or so away from finished, pull it out onto a cutting board and slice it using a fork and pizza cutter. Return meat to skillet and cook until it reaches the desired wellness.
• Shredding Chicken: Use a vegetable peeler to shred already boiled or baked chicken. Be sure to use a fork to hold the chicken in place as you quickly shred using the peeler.
• Chopping Garlic: I used to buy pre-minced garlic and thought it tasted just as great as the real thing... WRONG!!!! I can't believe how much better freshly chopped garlic tastes. There's a great new tool that has become my favorite kitchen gadget! Quickly peel garlic and place it into the top of this rolling garlic chopper. Roll back and forth on your counter and in seconds you've got freshly chopped garlic!
• Pizza Cutters, not just for pizza: I have 3 pizza cutters because we use them so much. Consider them for cutting crusts off PB&J sandwiches, slicing through waffles and pancakes, cutting celery or fruit or chopping meat into small pieces for soups and salads.
• Green Beans: Rather than sit and pop the ends off of all of your green beans one by one, grab a handful, tap the ends of the bunch on your counter and chop. Flip the bunch over and allow the ends to fall to the counter and chop once more. This works for the ends of asparagus too.

You know you're sick when...

The flu of the century hit our house this past weekend. All of us got it but luckily my husband was well enough to take care of us... and hopefully he doesn't fully come down with it. Bored of out my skull today, I decided to remark on a card from http://someecards.com that poked fun of Alzheimer's. A few people responded by telling me to lighten up and that sometimes laughter is the only thing we have when illness strikes. On that note, I'd like to recap the top 10 ways we knew we were sick beyond repair.

1. Catheter and diabetes supplies are only a phone call away. You know that because you've seen about a million ads. Do you need any advice on denture cream?
2. The water department calls to ask if you have a leak because your household water use has tripled. At this point you pray that your washing machine doesn't die.
3. Your washing machine tries to die as you attempt to wash a queen size quilt... I know some of you can.
4. You start to worry that the health department will have your house condemned. This might be an easier solution than cleaning it once you have the strength
5. The thought of brushing your teeth is more disgusting to you than not brushing them.
6. A shower sounds so good but can you make it back to bed?
7. An annoying thought or phrase gets stuck in your head over and over and over and ov.....
8. Your dreams would carve a great time slot on the sci-fi channel. Was that a turtle you were having a martini with on the back of a cloud?
9. If you're not sick yet, you lay in bed half asleep knowing that your children will soon need you but that you need your rest because it's only a matter of time. Was that heartburn or the flu quickly creeping into your stomach?
10. The thought, "this is a disease nobody has ever heard of before. Someday, it will be named after me because this is going to do me in," repeats in your head.

Stay healthy my friends!

What matters most?

I can't tell you the number of times I've been standing in line at a store, doing my best to keep my kids from hitting one another or taking down a near by display, only to hear someone tell me, "Enjoy it now. These years go by so fast." I know these strangers have the best intentions and that what they are telling me is true. However, when I've "had a day" it's a little annoying and overwhelming to hear. Tell a crazed mother of a toddler that these are the best years and you'll likely have her crying a river because she believes that this really is as good as it gets.

I love to scrapbook. It's time spent crafting, talking with friends and looking at pictures of the good times. Nobody ever scraps the fight they've had with their husband, a funeral they were at... well some people might but they're kinda strange, or the time their kid woke up decorating the halls with vomit. No, the times you scrapbook are the good times and those that are to be remembered. Every time I look at pictures just a year old, I'm amazed at how much my kids have grown. It really is scary to realize how quickly time marches on. I'm amazed every Sunday that it really has been a week since I sat in my pew and heard the last sermon. All of this reflection got me thinking, what are my priorities?

Take out a piece of paper and a pen. Write down what you wish your priorities were. In a perfect world how much time would you spend with God? What about with your kids and their homework? What about your exercise routine? How much time would you want to spend on a clean house or paying bills. Be realistic and realize that some of these tasks have to stay on your list whether or not you like it. Next, write a list of the things you do everyday. Next to those activities, write down the amount of time it takes you to do these things. Now, list them by how much time they take you, the most amount of time first descending down to the things that take the least amount of time. Compare your two lists. Are the activities you wish had priority in your life really the ones that are most important?

In reality, most of us will admit that our exercise routine doesn't get as much attention as our housecleaning. More of us will admit that our time with God really starts to fall towards the end of the list even though we might want it towards the top 3. What drives you to accomplish the things on your "real" list? Are they set appointments or commitments? Do you write them down on your to-do list? Schedule your day differently. Take your top priorities from your ideal list and schedule those first. Write it down and stick with your plan. Try it for just one week and see how you feel. You might realize at the end that this really is as good as it gets!

Red light, Green light

In these modern times, I can't believe I still can't turn my doorbell on and off. I'm sure someone has already invented this but why isn't readily available to consumers? We can turn our home phones off, set our cell phones to silent or vibrate, have our emails automatically respond that we're unavailable but we can't stop our doorbells from ringing.

We're lucky to live on a great street with lots of kids. Unfortunately, our street is a through street that serves as a speedway for many cars. After requests were denied for speed bumps, I've decided that I'm just not comfortable letting my 6-year-old play in the front yard unattended. It is rare that I have time to sit outside while my kids play so they usually end up in the back yard or in the playroom. Many of my son's friends do play outside and ask if he can come out.

One day, my doorbell rang 6 times... yes 6 times. Luckily I didn't have a sleeping baby upstairs but I was starting to go a little "ringy dingy" myself. It's not that I don't want kids asking to play with my son. It's fun to watch him develop friendships with kids on our street. However, I really do need a way to organize my time and set up playtimes with his friends. I think I've finally found a solution and I hope it works for you as well.

I made a two-sided card that hangs in the front window near my door. One side is green and the other is red. I explained to my son's friends that when the card is red that he can't come outside and not to ring the doorbell except in case of an emergency. When the card is green, he can play and it's okay to ring the doorbell. Until summer hits, this card will likely stay red most of the time but it really is working for our family. It's always so hard when a friend comes over, rings the bell and I have to tell him that we can't play. My kids get so disappointed and I feel guilty that I don't drop whatever I'm doing and rush outside for a play date. I think it's better for our friends too because they don't have to come all the way up to our front door only to be told "no" again. I find that this system works better than "do not ring bell" because I may still want my vendors and other people to ring the bell.